the napping gods are against me. i’d slipped on fresh bed sheets, slid under the snuggly softness, and began to fall into a dream, when the phone rang. “hey,” said the booming voice. it was joel. “why are you yelling?” i asked him. “are you taking a nap?” “uh…yeah,” i said. “go back to sleep.” […]

if i lived in a rainy town, i would never want to get out of bed. i would just open the blinds and lie perfectly still beneath my covers, drifting in and out of sleep, reading the book on my nighttable, scribbling cloudy thoughts in my journal, taking slow sips of tea, giggling and whispering […]

we looked for an apartment this weekend, driving around in circles in the pouring rain. at the first place we saw, i fell down several slippery steps, scratching my elbows, bruising my thighs and landing on my butt, and i wanted to give up right then. we saw a few more apartments: a house that […]

me: “so, i’m moving, again. my landlord’s being a jerk and i’m getting evicted and–” ricky: “yeah, i read it on your mass mailing.” me: “oh.” sometimes, the internet takes the fun out of everything.

my head is spinning with street names and numbers and dollar signs. my hand is tired from circling and crossing out and making big stars in pink ink. my stomach is tumbling with anticipation and frustration and hope. it’s a bit overwhelming, and it’s just begun. we are looking for a new place to live. […]

tonight i saw a shooting star. i was cruising down the 405 and watched it soar over city national bank and disappear over the hill. and then i blinked and the sky was black, again. i didn’t make a wish, although i suppose i should have; there are more than enough things i could wish […]

i’d almost forgotten what it was like to lose yourself in a novel. to take it with you wherever you go and sneak a few chapters while you’re waiting for your friend to show up or before your food gets to the table. to think about the characters while you’re driving, or walking, or standing […]

last night, at the record store, we pored over the stacks of cassettes that were being sold for 99 cents. some of them were bands we’d never heard of and some were bands we wished we’d never heard of, but some were bands we once loved. one was a tape he had bought for his […]

valentine’s day is for suckers and saps. i, of course, am both. sometimes, i think i don’t believe in romance, anymore. i don’t believe in one special boy for that one special girl, i don’t believe in once upon a time or happily ever after. i don’t believe that love will conquer anything. no. i […]

mindless tasks soothe my weary brain. copying and collating and stapling and filing; this is all i can handle right now. i could not sleep last night. note: i can sleep under virtually any condition, so a sleepless night is indication that something is surely wrong. something is surely wrong, and i do not know […]