so, i am in love. with a computer. my new computer. an ibook. it’s just how i like ’em: sleek, shiny and sharp. and so stylish it makes your eyes hurt. i can already see this becoming a co-dependent relationship; i came to my parents’ house to take them to the airport tomorrow, and i […]

when people ask me when was the last time i went to the philippines i say three years ago. december 1998. it was our family reunion, the first time we’d all been there at the same time since we left in 1976. i leave it at that, and it doesn’t even occur to me that […]

who am i trying to fool? i can be bitter. i can get angry. i can feel hopeless. but i am still the same girl who thought she could step into a mirror and find herself somewhere else. i still wish on stars. i keep drifting off in daydreams. i have faith in the world. […]

some people give me hope. others drain it out of me. i am trying to believe. i am trying to believe that people are kind and that intentions are good, but i just don’t know right now. i’m trying to believe that this is the exception to the rule and that i am getting carried […]

i spent the afternoon in chinatown. it was an experiment in photography and cultural analysis. or, a late lunch and shopping spree. and what makes it chinatown? chinese characters on street signs, a bank of america with a slanted roof, paper lanterns and american flags. chow fun, dim sum, boba. silk slippers, peacock feathers, jade […]

the party, by the way, was a blast. there were twinkly lights lining the window and candles floating in the bathtub and fresh flowers throughout the house. there was lumpia and chips and guacamole and salsa and spinach dip. there was beer and wine and vodka and rum and slices of lime and ice, plenty […]

yesterday, i celebrated my independence. i rolled out of bed when i couldn’t stay in bed any longer, i baked a pan of brownies and ate one for breakfast, and i lazed about in my pajamas until well after noon. we sought air-conditioned spaces later and ended up at the two-story target and the movies. […]

“so what are you working on?” “nothing.” “no really, what are you working on?” “actually, i’m really not working on anything. i haven’t been writing anything at all.” * there is no explanation. there is no situation. there is nothing. everything’s fine. really. i just have nothing to say that hasn’t been said before. or […]

there’s glitter everywhere and twinkly lights in my eyes. i’m folding laundry with the jackson five, and she’s cleaning her room with steely dan. we’re getting ready to party. saturday is the big housewarming, and i am all fluttery with nerves. i sat down and made lists, taking stock of what to buy, what to […]

it’s getting hot, really hot, and it makes me lazy and cranky and sweaty. i actually considered getting my sweat glands surgically removed, but then my mother told me there were usually complications with those sorts of operations. i imagined the sweat instead pouring from various glands throughout my body, like a pipe that kept […]