No!

October 14, 2004

There are a lot of things I’m not good at. I can’t throw a ball to save my life. I have a heck of a time balancing a checkbook. I get stage fright in front of big crowds. If I were a superhero, Rama and I joke, one of my weaknesses would be that I am too nice. I don’t know how to say “No.”

This year, however, one of my unwritten resolutions has been to find my limit and stick with it. To take, as well as give. To slow down.

But somehow, as another year’s end approaches, when the resolutions are a faraway memory, I am forgetting it all. I am trying to do way too much, and it’s making my head spin. My project list is longer than its ever been, and the deadlines are approaching before I can blink twice.

Part of me thinks this way is the only way. Life is short, a voice in my head says, and you better do all that you can while you can. But another voice laughs and retorts, Don’t forget to slow down and enjoy the ride. Life is short.

I want to learn how to slow down.
I want to learn the difference between challenging myself and driving myself mad.
I want to spend a day without a list of deadlines and to-do’s.
I want to say–rather, shout out loud–No!

 


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