June 2001
Party girl
there’s glitter everywhere and twinkly lights in my eyes. i’m folding laundry with the jackson five, and she’s cleaning her room with steely dan. we’re getting ready to party. saturday is the big housewarming, and i am all fluttery with nerves. i sat down and made lists, taking stock of what to buy, what to […]
Read more >>Hot
it’s getting hot, really hot, and it makes me lazy and cranky and sweaty. i actually considered getting my sweat glands surgically removed, but then my mother told me there were usually complications with those sorts of operations. i imagined the sweat instead pouring from various glands throughout my body, like a pipe that kept […]
Read more >>Bang, bang
i bummed my first cigarette last night, but i didn’t smoke it. i got it for joel, who was too shy to ask his fellow addicts, standing in the cloud of nicotine outside. “it’ll make a good story for your website,” he said. so, there you go. wasn’t that good? * we need to stop […]
Read more >>Action & adventure
the heat is melting my energy away. i can’t stand to do anything for more than 5 minutes before my brow begins to drip with sweat, short-circuiting my brain. i need an electric fan. i fell asleep after writing that paragraph. it’s now almost 8pm, and i’m drinking my first cup of coffee of the […]
Read more >>Afternoon special
outside it’s boiling, inside it’s freezing. i can’t sit still, but i can’t leave. this is no way to spend a friday afternoon. i close my eyes and pretend i’m on summer vacation. i want to hang out in the swimming pool, ride my 10-speed up and down the street and eat otter pops until […]
Read more >>Open house
so this. this is where i live. that’s our front porch. one afternoon, i’m going to wipe down the chair and set a table out there and sit with a book and a cup of something and watch everyone on the street. that’s our big window that i stare out of when i’m sitting in […]
Read more >>Hold me like you’ll never let me go
i am on a karaoke high, music ringing in my ears & sake sinking into my veins. i wore the tiara and the wings and the glitter and floated through the crowd and onto the stage and i sang. i sang. i don’t even know where i learned that song, but each note rolled off […]
Read more >>Lovely imperfection
we all need someone to tell us we’re perfect, once in a while. even if — no, especially since — we’re not. because it doesn’t mean we never make mistakes or don’t do stupid things. it doesn’t mean we don’t trip and fall and stumble constantly. it doesn’t mean we are not complete and utter […]
Read more >>All that was missing was the smoke
sitting there in the bar, i knew exactly what he meant. about feeling small. about feeling like a speck of dust in a pile of boulders. compared to their stories, my childhood was candy coated and rainbow colored. listening to them talk about what they went through, about what kids are going through right now, […]
Read more >>Escape to New York
a year ago, i was plotting my escape. my head filled with dreams, my pants filled with ants, i was so desperate to get out. i wanted to go there at once. today, i find myself buying bookshelves and shoe racks and welcome mats. i am tearing out ideas from martha stewart and pad, and […]
Read more >>Whatever-you-want-to-call-it fever
there is a piece of me that feels 15 and wants to do 15-year-old things, like going to the mall and blowing my money on lip gloss and tank tops and records, going to pool parties and amusement parks and the beach, and following a boy to work to drop off love notes. i want […]
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