if all else fails, write about your wants. you are always longing for something, whether it be something tangible or something nebulous. just because you cross things off the list doesn’t mean the list itself disappears. you want, you get, and then you want some more. sometimes you confuse these with your needs, but they […]

tomorrow, my parents will have been married 34 years. this astounds me, if only for the mere fact that thirty four years is almost one and a half times my age. but what astounds me even more is that, after all this time, they are still deeply in love. i know this, not because they […]

a night like this, and i think all i really need is a pot of coffee, an endless stream of good music, watercolors, rubber stamps, a thin black sharpie, double-sided tape, a bundle of twine, a stack of paper and an empty space on the carpet, and i could stay up all night long, for […]

walking into my cubicle this morning, i found a plastic bag filled with dirt sitting beside my keyboard. as if i weren’t cranky enough already, i thought, somebody’s leaving crap on my desk? and what was this person doing at my desk in the first place? and why is today such a horrible god awful […]

i pull into the parking lot and, while i feel there is something very wrong about using a cellphone in such a place, i call my parents to see where they are. “three minutes away,” dad says, “have you already gone inside?” “no,” i say. “why not?” “because i’m scared.” i know i will have […]

i can’t keep my eyes off her, and i know that’s what she wants. i am trying to focus on the band, but my eyes keep roving to left of stage, where she and her guido boyfriend can’t stand still. she’s wearing a black tank top, a studded belt, tight jeans and stilettos. he’s in […]

i have to admit, thursdays are starting to grow on me. there’s corn chowder steaming in a bowl and two slices of rosemary bread with a dab of soft butter. there’s the LA weekly fresh off the press and free postcards for the taking. there’s people watching and artwork analyzing, all against the backdrop of […]

last night i dreamt of espionage and gasoline and car chases and my grandmother and church. it was rather unnerving, and i awoke to the phone ringing, thereby thwarting my efforts to solve these subconscious mysteries. i need closure. and every morning when i wake up, my throat hurts. it has since my trip to […]

my uncle tony died the other day, suddenly and too soon. not only was he an amazing artist, but he was also a kind, generous and compassionate man, and i feel lucky to have known him. he had no children but a wife who was always by his side, and in my memory, there was […]

and we can talk about inspiration and making a difference and changing the world. we can talk about baby steps and helping hands, we can talk about group efforts and great strides, we can talk until we’re blue in the face, but talk only gets you so far. inspiration is the easy part. it’s the […]