September 2001
Painted angels and evergreens
she asked me if there were evergreen trees nearby. “i see palm trees everywhere, but no evergreens. i didn’t know LA would be like this.” i scanned the streets in my mind but couldn’t think of anywhere with evergreens, not in the city. “i don’t know,” i said. “why?” “i’m just looking for a place […]
Read more >>Fine
my thighs feel like sausages. (and my stomach feels like a big doughy roll.) i told my friend peter that i think i am getting a beer belly and he just laughed. “HA HA HA HA. you look fine.” but maybe i don’t want to look fine.
Read more >>Waiting
i barely saw his eyes over the lamp. he was slumped in the red velvet chair against the orange-sponged walls. he had dark eyes and thick hair that went to his shoulders. he had a beard that went just as long. even his eyebrows were full. parked beside him was a black suitcase on wheels. […]
Read more >>The leaves do fall
i am so unamused with these last blasts of hot air. isn’t it supposed to be fall? last night, i took a nap after dinner, and woke up feeling sticky and gross and disoriented. indian summer, i muttered, and dragged myself out of bed. seth and stella rescued me from my oven-baked house and we […]
Read more >>Bedhead
she had stringy blonde hair and pale, yellowing skin. she was scowling, and it seemed she should never have gotten out of bed that morning. –somewhere between LA and OC
Read more >>Understatement of the year
to say that he was top heavy is a gross understatement. he was built like an upside-down pear, nay, a 40 watt lightbulb. –sea-tac airport
Read more >>Welcoming committee
a boy in a white t-shirt with blue trim, baggy jeans and black flip-flops called his mom on his cellphone. he was drinking aquafina. when the flight arrived, he held up a corrugated cardboard sign that read, in black ballpoint ink, “welcome home, SHNOK-EN.” –LAX, terminal 3, gate 32
Read more >>Still standing (still)
you said los angeles wouldn’t be standing come morning, but look, here we are, still standing, smog, sunshine and silver lake. i drove up the west side of the reservoir and everyone was up and about so early in the morning. there was a father trying to block the view of his son peeing against […]
Read more >>Please try again
i am fresh out of words tonight, but i want you to know i’m okay. i feel silly having you believe otherwise.
Read more >>Salty tears
tonight, the tears came. i hadn’t been able to cry all week, although i wanted to, although i felt like i should (and felt guilty that i hadn’t). i cried for the mother clutching the framed photographs of the child she’d never see again. i cried for the children who have to see the horrific […]
Read more >>Long lost love
i call it the Long Lost Love because i have held a torch for it since we first met four years ago: in the hot, crowded loft of the saucebox. i developed a serious crush, fast and hard, and could not stop thinking about it. four years later, and i could not stop thinking about […]
Read more >>Take a moment
i feel like i am not educated enough, not smart enough, not brave enough to talk to you like this. i am good at opening my big mouth but i am not as good at getting things done and quite frankly, i am so terrified i’m paralyzed and i have done nothing for anyone but […]
Read more >>Making peace
we went to the beach tonight. there were no planes overhead, only stars. we lit a fire and did cartwheels in the sand and sang songs under the whirring wind. my mom begged me not to go anywhere public, but it is too hard to stay in the house, where i am tempted to feed […]
Read more >>Before today
i have never been good with politics or history or world affairs. this world is too big for me to comprehend. (it never sat in the palm of my hand.) i can barely get a handle on myself, my family and friends, much less tragedies such as this. i keep thinking of the people who […]
Read more >>oh god, oh god, oh god
all the circuits are busy and i am gripping my phone so tightly and i can’t stop pacing around the house and i just want you to be ok. i don’t want to leave my house today. i just want to tell everyone how much i love them. everyone, i love you. (it’s so strange, […]
Read more >>3,000 words
i want to hide behind my viewfinder and capture the world in a snap. what is it about photographs that i love so much? it’s a reality that i cannot avoid. when i look in the mirror, i might not see what you see. but when i look at a photograph, it’s right there. in […]
Read more >>I don’t need no stinkin’ career
you know you’ve been working too hard when you can say one of the following phrases without arching an eyebrow: “so, make all snips snippet.” “we need to find out the difference between link and links.” “we should just spell it out. nobody knows what woc is.” this morning, i woke up from a crappy […]
Read more >>First comes love, then comes marriage
most parents want their children to graduate college and get a good job and raise a family in a nice home, but when i was growing up, my dad wanted me to be a nun. i used to tell him that if God called me that i would gladly say yes, but God never did. […]
Read more >>Sand dunes
“what is she wearing?” “i don’t know.” something inbetween pasties and a bikini top, i thought. she had strange breasts, too. like two low sand dunes fairly far apart from one another. –the red lion inn
Read more >>Yee-haw
a mexican cowboy in a mud brown suit walking–no, sauntering–down the street. –little ethiopia, fairfax blvd.
Read more >>