and i am trying so hard not to try to be clever or cute or charming, here
January 13, 2002whatever you think of me, it’s wrong. i am not that brave, i am not that strong.
“how do you do it?” people ask me.
and i ask them back, “do what?”
“keep it together,” they say.
and then i laugh.
because i feel like i am just unraveling slowly and soon i will fall apart.
tonight, i am lonely and sad and scared.
and maybe i should say that more often. maybe i should frown more, cry more, scream more. maybe i should let myself crumble and let someone else pick up the pieces for me. maybe i should admit for once that i need someone just as much as everyone else.