my mouth is a tea cup and i’ve got a string dangling out of the corner of my mouth. but that’s what the instructions said, right? yes. i read them at least five times, and clearly it said: “if there is excessive bleeding after a period of six hours, place a dry tea bag on the surgical site and maintain firm pressure for at least one hour.” i don’t know that it’s necessarily excessively<\/i> bleeding, but it’s still bleeding after 8 hours and that sure as hell feels excessive to me.<\/p>\n
so, i’ve got the tea bag stewing, an icepack pressed up against my left jaw, my hair pulled back in a half-ponytail and surely i am a vision of loveliness. i look like a supermodel, and you’re just wishing you could see.<\/p>\n
i am beautiful.<\/p>\n
wait, no. i feel like hell, and the vicodin has made me woozy.<\/p>\n
i tell myself i will only take it this one last time, because i know what that shit does, it fucks with you man. the bottle’s instructions say take it with food, but the instructions from the oral surgeon (3. Diet – drink lots of liquids including juices, milk, water, soups, etc.) say i shouldn’t be eating more than liquid. i’ve eaten two cups of miso soup and drunk maybe 12 ounces of water. i am hungry. i want ravioli. i want pizza. i want sushi. i want a cheeseburger, yes, a cheeseburger. oh god, i want a double-double with grilled onions, fries and a vanilla shake.<\/p>\n
surely it’s the vicodin speaking, because i can’t imagine any other reason i’d be writing this at 2:15am.<\/p>\n
i got a tooth pulled today. one of those bloody (no pun intended) wisdom teeth, and it’s been killing me all day and night. i sleep in hour-long intervals. i roll around. i sleep some more. i get up and walk around. i re-freeze my ice pack. i fall back asleep. i check my email. i go back to bed.<\/p>\n
i will probably forget this ever happened come morning, and then i’ll open up netscape and see this entry on the screen and laugh at myself.<\/p>\n
that is, if my mouth will open wide enough.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
my mouth is a tea cup and i’ve got a string dangling out of the corner of my mouth. but that’s what the instructions said, right? yes. i read them at least five times, and clearly it said: “if there is excessive bleeding after a period of six hours, place a dry tea bag on […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/maganda.org\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/207"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/maganda.org\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/maganda.org\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/maganda.org\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/maganda.org\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=207"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/maganda.org\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/207\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/maganda.org\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=207"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/maganda.org\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=207"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/maganda.org\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=207"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}